It’s unbearable how antsy I’ve been this week! So much is going on and I’m being swarmed in it. I’m losing another student tomorrow and word is I’ll be gaining two more in January. I love my job here at Sun Valley, I really do. I love everyone I work with. I love the students, even though they continually remind me of how much they hate me. I love my little apartment (although I long for a roommate!) and I love all the activities I am privileged to take part in. I love running around the field here and past the three crosses that sit atop the hill. But I can state without a shout of a doubt that I am ready to head down to the big city again!
Sometimes I ponder what my preference actually is- big city or middle of nowhere? Thinking back throughout life, I’ve resides in a variety of areas, ranging from the big city of Phoenix to the town of Lompoc and the dot on the map of Sun Valley. I really do value every moment I spend out here. It is very peaceful and I enjoy the quiet. The stars are visible on a regular basis and the sunsets are breath-taking, unique each evening. But something’s missing out here.
I traveled to Denver a few weeks ago and I’ve lived in Honolulu over the past three summers. Phoenix has always been an escape for me throughout college as well. These destinations offer numerous opportunities, from entertainment and exercise to many people and service projects. However, the hustle and bustle of the big city is not always appealing either.
Flagstaff was my favorite throughout college. Small town- yet filled with much! Skiing, hiking, dancing, food, and many friends!
I think that’s what it comes down to- the people. Moving every few years has allowed me to interact with a variety of people and make an abundance of friends! However, I always fall back on the ones who have known me for a while. Kim has been a friend for the past seven years, Bethany and Jenn for the past four. This may not sound like much to some who have known people since Kindergarten, but to me this feels like an eternity. It’s those people who know me best that I long to be near. That’s why it’s so easy to be near my brother and my parents. There is no explaining to do. They already know who I am. I don’t have to go through the whole process of “Hello. My name is Janna.” It can get frustrating.
Maybe that’s what frustrates me about Sun Valley sometimes. As previously stated, I greatly enjoy the company of everyone who works here. They are like a big family to me. But, no one here knows me well. No one GETS me. Kurtis gets me. My parents get me. Bethany and Jenn get me. Kim understood me even through my crazy high school years (if that’s even possible!).
I’m antsy because in a matter of only four days I will be with Jenn out and about in Flagstaff, being myself. In a mere five days I will be laying on the floor in Bethany’s house, able to be my complete self once again. In a week I will be with my family, where I don’t have to explain things.
Praise God for breaks and people who get me. Praise God that I will have roommates again (sort of) for a couple of days! (Someone to talk to when the lights go out…)
Just a little thought…
Hey, it's me, Bru, someone who has known you for about a week ;) While I barely know you, I do understand the frustration of people not knowing who you are. I always feel as though I am walking paradox that people have a difficult time grasping. One person gets this part of me, but fails to see something else, and it's different for each friend. However, I am also encouraged by the fact that we are always learning more about others and that God chose to make us so intricate that is nearly impossible for anyone but Him to completely know us. I love talking to old married couples who say they still are constantly learning new things about each other. Without that, I think life could grow stale. I don't know if that encouraged you at all, but it was worth a shot :)
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